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رسائل مضحكة بالانجليزية 2013 رسائل انجليزية مضحكة sms funny

رسائل مضحكة بالانجليزية 2013
رسائل موبايل , رسائل مضحكة , رسائل بالانجليزية , رسائل 2013 , sms , mobile , english , funny

I tried exercise but I was allergic to it. My skin flushed and my heart raced. I got sweaty and short of breath. I realised it is very dangerous.

A boss is like a diaper;
Always on your ass, and usually full of ****!

My therapist says I have an obsession with revenge. I'll see to it.

Changing Times:
When our phones fall, we panic;
When our friends fall, we laugh.

A brain walks into a bar and says, "I'll have a pint of beer please". "The barman looks at him and says, "Sorry, I can't serve you." "Why not?", asks the brain. The barman retorts, "Because you're already out of your head."

Everybody talks about finding the one that makes their heart skip a beat. But I'm not looking to develop a heart problem.

The only good time to talk about your past is when you are drunk and alone.

A guy just yelled at me for texting and driving. I told him to get off my hood and mind his own business.

Monday is God's way of punishing us for all that we did during the weekend.

After Monday and Tuesday, even the calender says WTF.

Someday your prince charming will come.
Mine just took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions.

A man dressed as an egg had tried to gain entry to last night's Euro 2012 Final. He was quickly whisked away by security and beaten.

The reason our knees get weak when we fall in love is because of the long walk it took to find the person.

Sometimes my mind asks...
Why I miss u?
Why I care 4 u?
Why I remember u?
Then my heart answers: Bcoz a mental patient needs more care!

Sri Sri Ravi Shankar: Knowledge and wisdom will save you from attachment.
Wait. Aren't you attached to your Rolls Royce fleet?

It takes a lot of experience for a girl to kiss like a beginner.

My neighbours loved the music so much that when I turned it up, they invited the police to listen.

Scientists discovered that beer contains female hormones. To prove this, they gave 3 men 12 pints. Suddenly they talked shit, gained weight and couldn't drive.

Q: Why doesn't the blind people like to sky dive?
A: Because it scares the hell out of the dog.

A beautiful girl puts her finger to Hotel Manager's lips. The manager kisses & and licks the finger.
Girl: Tell your boss that there is no tissue paper in the toilet!